We all know it is a world based on disruption, and by the time we age into the workforce we know the rules change as fast as we can learn them. Agility is key to our success, and yet fluidity can also leave us feeling disconnected, fragmented, disenfranchised. It’s no wonder, really. Yes, we survived the Fourth Industrial Revolution, but the price was very, very high.
We know we are the most drug addicted, depressed, and overworked cohort of adults in American history. We are witnessing climate collapse: scientists estimate that 150-200 species of plant, insect, bird and mammal become extinct every 24 hours. Globally, more than 264 million people of all ages suffer from chronic depression.
As a recent study by Accenture cites, executives estimate that in three years, 44% of the workforce will be comprised of contractors and/or temporary internal positions. And 79% of this liquid workforce will be aligned to dynamic projects, rather than static job functions. Er… that probably means you and me.
As a coach I get a front line seat to some mighty heavy combat sport in the arena. I get to help bind and heal the wounds. I cheer on victories. I watch failure, blame, shame and guilt take their toll. I see a lot of damaging narratives and internal loops I wish I could stop. I watch people play it safe; and I see people cut corners to take incredible risk. Some float and rise; some crash into the wall. Hindsight is usually 20:20 and I spend a lot of time trying to craft viewpoints around that. I get to help people craft their story and the words I use the most often – Pivot and Reframe. Are you getting Oxygen? What are you doing to make this sprint sustainable? And inevitably, always: so what did we learn?
When the ribbon starts to run so fast we are afraid it is going to snap, I find what brings the most immediate sense of balance to the moment is to ask my people to reflect. Just take a moment and try it. Reflection is where we separate ourselves from the heat of the moment and buffer just long enough to get perspective. Just long enough to self-regulate. To think – what have I learned? What can I learn from this? How will I take this and move forward?
I learned recently, from a rather well known chef, that a beautifully prepared meal should disrupt the five senses, and in doing so, shift your reality. I immediately thought the five senses were taste, touch, sight, sound, smell. But I was wrong. This chef’s ancient tradition insisted that the five senses are body, feeling, perception, intention, and consciousness.
And I felt my world shift. So, the next time you are at the rope’s end, the ground just vanishing beneath your feet – ask yourself these 5 questions to shift your reality:
- What is going on in my body? (Am I tired, exhausted, tense, anxious, hungry, in pain? Separate your body from your mind.)
- What am I feeling ? (Name those emotions, particularly the contradictory chords you are feeling: angry and sad, irritated and confused, joyful and agitated. Naming the emotion distances yourself from it and allows you to observe it.)
- What am I perceiving? (Remember, you only have one side of any conversation, so remember it is a perception, not necessarily a reality. By thinking through your perception, you invoke the ability to imagine the other individual’s perception. You acknowledge your limits. )
- What are my intentions? (And be sure to state them. There is no quicker cut to clarity than to state your intentions in a conversation or situation, particularly one fraught with tension.)
- Are you sitting in a state of mindfulness? (Consciousness is the art of being present in the moment, and preferably one infused with compassion. This is where you slip out of the moment and into a more reflective state of mind.)
We are complex and deliciously messy human beings. And our bodies, hearts, and minds are not designed to be so fractured and inundated with overwhelm, certainly not all the time.
Take the time to reflect. Take the time to check in. If you don’t create your own well of stillness, you remain at the mercy of the screen and a thousand distractions. Take it from a chef immersed in a tradition thousands of years old, operating from a certainty that understands the very fabric of time: you need to separate your mind from your body just long enough to take a deep breath, and reflect. All else will fall into place.